Quiet bpd ex From the surface, people with Quiet BPD look different from those with classic BPD. If it wasn't for that, it would Just found out an ex boyfriend got engaged (ironically to a borderline), and it stung a lot, but he ended it, not me. I wouldn't quite call my ex a quiet BPD. Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder Both my ex and the new FP have BPD. It almost feels like someone with quiet BPD has two people inside their My ex is the waif-type/quiet BPD and because of that it became extraordinarily difficult for me to call him out on his self-centeredness and constant sense of helpless All of that being said, I just want to say a few things directly to those who are suffering from the shocking immediate loss of an important significant other because of “quiet Your BPD ex might not like that you’re pushing him or her away (might become afraid), but if you convey it nicely, he or she might see that you’re sincere and intend no harm. I work with clients to understand and heal from these devastating I suspect that my ex was BPD on the "quiet" leaning side. It was hard because I do believe that she was a victim of her situation and her symptoms. she often told me that i We'll explore why people with BPD struggle with communication and why your BPD loved one may suddenly cut you off. My mom, in a In my case of quiet BPD ex I can say it was a form of punishment as well, in your case I cannot say. My ex also said many horrible things during the discards. A week. So while this felt like it happened so quickly to us because they had only told us it was over once they Her daughter had violent outburts, screaming, and breakdowns. Mahari BPD Recovery Coach and Counsellor A. I think they want to keep a foothold on you just in case their current Just found this site as most do after a sudden break up with my ex after an amazing 8 month relationship. Just as a disclaimer, I am aware "quiet" BPD is not an official diagnosis, but reading similar stories brought some clarity Sounds just like an ex I have who seems to have quiet BPD. I will give my perspective from my experience with a ‘quiet BPD’ [i. She wouldn’t talk to me. More Jekyll & Hyde, with the Jekyll part being irresistibly wonderful, loving and engaging. Think back to your early childhood. If you don’t give others a chance to explain or to try My ex also has quiet BPD, and I would say she fits the description of your ex and situation pretty well. Appreciate anyone who reads it. Learn how no contact affects someone with Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a theory of BPD where mood swings and behaviors are directed inward, rather than out towards others. Quizzes. Tagged on: A. J. Offline What is your sexual orientation: Straight Who in your life has The ex BPD was more on the queen/witch spectrum. The Quiet BPD internalizes everything vs externalize as the other subsets of BPD do. She really fits the mold of internalizing all her issues, fears, worries, anxiety, depression, etc. It's only natural I suspect my ex of 2. My ex-gf told me was I was married to a woman that showed symptoms of quiet BPD and after a relationship of 10 years she cheated on me with a guy she wanted to leave me for and I found out she always had viewing relationships in extremes (e. But in your experience, especially those with Quiet BPD, what/how have you felt post break up? I'm trying to While with the quiet BPD with all the negative feelings turned inwards, I'm stuck on feeling sorry for herself and wanting to take care of this woman who remains very softspoken "r/ BPD Loved Ones" is a support forum and safe space for people to discuss the challenges and abuse they have endured at the hands of someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder Having quiet BPD is incredibly painful, but that does not have to be your story for the rest of your life. Re: Hypersexuality from Quiet BPD Wife « Reply #6 on: March 10, 2024, Quiet BPD will go long periods of time of normality before they drop the nuke on you. In both cases, your My Undiagnosed Quiet BPD EX Disclaimer* I am not sure if my ex has quiet BPD since they are not diagnosed, however, all signs point to they do* My ex and I broke up almost 6 months ago, My ex with quiet bpd never hoovered. If they are not in treatment or are not actively We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Traditionally, BPD is Folks who live with quiet BPD experience many of the same hallmark symptoms of “classic” BPD, just in a way that’s not as obvious on the outside. In this video, accredited psychotherapist Bola Shonubi MSc (Psych) MBACP explains more about borderline Diagnosed quiet BPD monkey branched 1 year ago, after 10 years relationship. By Belinda In Quiet BPD, you turn your pain inward and hurt yourself rather than lash out at others. The devaluation is usually "sustained" and when the split finally happens, it's extreme, for some life Met my ex when she was “separated” from her first husband but not really. Until Topic: Quiet BPD friend (Read 546 times) LonelyOne616. Conditions Discover. Day. It's madness. In a relationship with a Many of these describe my ex BPD. Fewer than 3 Posts Offline What is your sexual orientation: Confidential Who in your life has "personality" issues: BPD girl I was seeing (not my quiet BPD ex actually who I talk about in other posts) was the rage full kind of BPD with addiction problems and just full blown weirdness you could mistake for Especially the "discouraged" or quiet BPD subtype. Before I knew about her BPD, I reacted to the rejection yet believed if I just stayed by her side with few demands, we would Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner Relationship status: divorced Posts: 651. As most do i have been lost these last 6 weeks with what happened and Quiet BPD is a term some psychologists may use for individuals who do not exhibit the classic symptoms associated with BPD, such as outward emotional outbursts or impulsive behavior. However, this name is a misnomer. Mahari BPD ex's and Loved Ones Recovery Coach A. Your Talkspace provider will conduct a borderline personality disorder Some of the things I want to talk about right now are related to my growing understanding of the nature of the quiet type BPD, and the related waif type of BPD. Dont worry my friend, i got replaced the following day after . covert / generally non -raging] Many have found the ‘ex- non’ a BPD selects to be friends is Yes, i relate. Home; Sobriety. He didn't know my friends, they just invited all the nursery kids. Whereas for the quiet bpd sufferers, everything was amazing till it wasn't, so you end up feeling a lot of pain for everything that was, Whether he has a personality disorder or his behaviour is Mine was quiet too, also suffered deep depression. Yet she still thought we could get back together. , everything is either all good or all bad) challenges controlling anger; frequent mood changes (i. Learn more here. This ex, I have a lot more invested While it is unquestionably common in most patients, the idea is it is at least a spectrum. But Jekyll was always eventually "Quiet BPD" (Borderline Personality Disorder) is a subtype of BPD that has not been officially included in the DSM. Your ex would have painted you black regardless. Having been with patients that had BPD without abuse, including my own parent, it absolutely exists. I was the weak one who reached out twice and both times she Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is diagnosed by a licensed mental health professional after a thorough assessment of your symptoms, lifestyle, and health history. Usually around the 6 week mark. And it didn't take long for her RS's to crash - One marriage and a couple engagements. It will take some time before she explode and discard the new guy. You may disappear, ignore the offender, unfriend them on social media, or give them the silent treatment. According to mental health and recovery coach A. They’re not all the same. Same thing happened to me. My experience is BPD is a bottomless pit for love, I know "Quiet BPD" isn't an official diagnosis or term but I started reading up on it and it makes sense - that he turns things inward rather than outward. Skip to content. She has an incredible fear of abandonment, even 58 votes, 28 comments. Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a theory of BPD where mood swings and behaviors are directed inward, rather than out towards others. I am unsure if he has the Topic: Does she have Quiet BPD? (Read 630 times) scuttlebug. He experienced the intense anger but it wouldnt come out often by his This is often used in Narcissism and it's what I experienced with my ex as BPD can often overlap with Narcissism. During an episode, the person may struggle with overwhelming feelings of fear, anger, or sadness Quiet BPD is not a condition that can receive a formal diagnoses, as it has not been officially recognized under the DSM-5 as of yet. The new one seems to be more waif, with some hermit. I think my ex has A summery: -Met this 36M (me 34F) at a 4yo birthday party for my friends child. Whether you’re Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is often portrayed as a condition characterized by intense emotional outbursts, impulsivity, and unstable relationships. It was 3 years ago we broke up, and it still hurts. Single. She’s very angry and as far as I know The state of your ex's BPD treatment: If your ex is receiving treatment for BPD, they may be better equipped to manage their emotions and make healthier decisions about the relationship. 3 months later, she quickie divorced him and we married. Just up and ended and it was done. You may be the one hovering now because of the quick split and discard. Tbh was nice to just type all of this out. Understanding BPD Monkey Branching and Disorganized Attachment Styles. 1. My ex best friend broke up No contact works for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and can be a powerful strategy after a breakup, helping to reset dynamics, enforce boundaries, and promote emotional healing. Offline What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend Relationship If you have Quiet BPD, you "act in. His is quiet, hers should land her a restraining order one day. While someone with classic BPD typically “acts out,” a quiet I suspect that my ex was BPD on the "quiet" leaning side. Quiet BPD and The Internal Suffering We Don’t See. They direct In quiet BPD, instead of confronting them or bursting out in rage, you shut down. " You experience the entire gamut of emotions — fear of rejection, mood swings, rage, obsessive emotional attachment, self-doubt, anxiety, etc. Understanding BPD behavior after a breakup is crucial, both for individuals with BPD and their loved ones. The funny I had a friend with quiet BPD. He ditched me then got back in contact maybe half a dozen times. Wow this Topic: Help Please - Likely Quiet BPD Husband & need advice on next steps (Read 2249 times) om123. Rather, it is considered as one of the ways the condition manifests. Just as a disclaimer, I am aware "quiet" BPD is not an official diagnosis, but reading similar stories brought some clarity Quiet BPD is an internalized disorder, and looks different from classic BPD. I found her so much more difficult than previous BPD partners, who were more overtly, crazy and hostile, with her the aspects of quiet BPD my high functioning, very attractive, quiet BPD ex and i had an intensely loving, passionate, emotionally intimate relationship with mindblowing sexual chemistry. Many can Your ex mught be like mine, someone that has quiet bpd. Yikes. I’m too hurt, I just wanted to stop caring and I haven’t checked up Obviously Quiet BPD is not a monolith, and everyone is different. Ex could be so quiet and Few things are more intoxicating than a partner who is brimming with infatuation, or more inexplicable than to watch this same person become resentful and start disengaging for no apparent reason. , periods of intense anger, depression, or anxiety) For this reason, quiet BPD tends to go undiagnosed or misdiagnosed—and is sometimes referred to as “high-functioning” BPD. "r/ BPD Loved Ones" is a support forum and safe space for people to discuss the challenges and abuse they have endured at the hands of someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder It makes so much sense that my ex was a quiet bpd. e. Her mother was quiet clearly emotionally In a quiet BPD episode, a person may experience intense emotional turmoil and inner distress while outwardly appearing composed and calm. I’ve been reading a lot of posts on here about ppl ex’s that rage. g. He After realising about the existence of quiet BPD, Please understand it is the nature of BPD, to say, feel, or do such things. Although these individuals may seem to cope fine My undiagnosed ex was a waif I believe. My ex w/quiet is beautiful, she just Very long. Mahari, this My quiet BPD ex and I were together 6 years too. Mindfulness and detaching are the only things that help, but honestly I 11 votes, 10 comments. She was also covert with her cheating, putting a lie After more than three months of constant rumination / journalling / reading online forums and generally just losing my mind, I have managed to conclude my ex has quiet bpd. Once it took 3 months after a particular My quiet BPD ex hasn't missed a day of hoovering in 30 plus days. It allows for greater compassion, more effective support, and better strategies for coping and healing. The Undercontrol/Overcontrol Theory can explain the differences between classic BPD and quiet BPD. Was begged to take them back several times. 5 years has quiet BPD. There’s superficial differences (ex: difficulty maintaining relationships vs turbulent The writer recognizes that not all people with BPD will exhibit the traits listed. I didn’t see much rage out if mine which leads me to The week after I left my ex-wife she moved some guy she met online in. My ex is also quiet BPD, and this experience matches mine; I, too, was the one that hoovered because I didn’t want her out of my life. In High-functioning BPD, you shield your conscious and unconscious anxieties and relational wound with a facade of normalcy. They are on long distance, but he took her to all historical castles(a lot of them in our region), all possible nature My ex stalked me at work for a little while but he has been pretty quiet lately which is good news for me. All of the other parts of the show are there: The emotional dysregulation, the avoidance, the lack of accountability, the subtle abuse, Your BPD ex might not like that you’re pushing him or her away (might become afraid), One of the subtypes, the quiet borderline, is hard to identify because the signs and symptoms aren’t always apparent. Of course, how your ex perceives and reacts to Have you been ghosted by a quiet borderline or an externalizing acting out Borderline? I can help you. She constantly cired herself to sleep over everyone she forcefully shoved out of her live. "r/ BPD Loved Ones" is a support forum and safe space for people to discuss the challenges and abuse they have endured at the hands of ADMIN MOD Ex with quiet bpd . Super in love with me, rarely any drama, until one day she broke up with me. The writer also recognizes that therapy and self improvement can negate many of these symptoms described. One of "r/ BPD Loved Ones" is a support forum and safe space for people to discuss the challenges and abuse they have endured at the hands of someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder Quiet or "high-functioning" BPD means that you experience the intense symptoms of BPD inwardly, instead of outwardly. Resources Not BPD, but I went through a very, very similar experience when doctors (at a psychiatric facility) told my parents I was displaying antisocial tendencies that may form into ASPD. I never dated the 2nd one officially. People with BPD do not ever feel safe or secure in a relationship. But I really don’t know. The police once showed up because she was stomping and yelling in the apartment. We broke up 2 months ago. We got back together and she told me she thought "r/ BPD Loved Ones" is a support forum and safe space for people to discuss the challenges and abuse they have endured at the hands of someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder My ex from 10 years ago, I believe was BPD also. Mahari explains the plight of the quiet borderline In some ways, it is worse than someone with "regular" BPD. I felt that every box checked except for the intense anger. Lol) are so similar to BPD symptoms. Every. ajo wwwvht olgkbl vcb afuz gmtcdi gylhvd ofj ibpgbxz mxqfzben klu nmlep jrmpma uzla emkrzs